The Coffee Place's Joke Stack
Title: Kook Book Humor #13 - Al Martin
Fork:
Basic cooking and eating implement whose appearance on the table in the Middle Ages was preceded by the knife and spoon, which have been around since prehistoric times in one form or another. The fork has since turned up in countless shapes and adaptations, including the heavy Bowie fork (1828), the rather deadly Italian switch-fork (about 1885), the huge machete-like Cuban forchete wielded by the cucumberos on the ill-fated zucchini plantations in the Sierra Maestre (1909), and the stiletto-like forchonet mounted on the rifles of the French Culinary Corps in World War I (1914). Persons interested in the fascinating development of this utensil are urged to peruse Fleix Borchardt's excellent three-volume work, "The Tines, They Are A'Changin'".
Freezer:
Insulated and refrigerated compartment used to store food for long periods of time without spoiling. The behavior of edible substances at sub zero temperatures is quite unpredictable, and, if left untouched in a freezer for a week or more, some foods, such as T-bone steaks, frozen French fries, and pints of ice cream, can inexplicably be transformed into a single two-quart serving of frozen split-pea soup in a large plastic tub.
French Toast:
A popular breakfast dish consisting of slices of white bread dipped into a mixture of milk and beaten egg, fried in butter and served with maple syrup and/or powdered sugar. Variations include: Welch toast (a slice of white bread fried in beer batter), Scotch toast (a slice of stale white bread), and Irish toast (beer).
Frying:
Cooking method in which food is immersed in hot oil and quickly browned while the house is slowly smoked.
Gadget:
Any mechanical device that performs a kitchen task in one-twentieth the time it takes to find it.
Game:
A surprisingly large number of people shrink from eating game animals such as duck, rabbit, and deer because in childhood they were exposed to endearing characters like Donald Duck, Peter Rabbit, Bugs Bunny, the Easter Bunny, Thumper, and Bambi. Alas, ingrained habits are difficult to change, but you can protect your children from an inappropriate sentimental aversion to delicious dishes like canard a l'orange, civet de lapin, and venison stew by giving them, as early as possible, some of the illustrated volumes from the excellent "Young Gourmet" series published by the Trencherman Press, including "The Adventures of Fred Duck, Chick Molester," "Roscoe Rabbit and the Gun Bunnies," and "Buck Deer, the Kitten Killer."
Garlic:
Aromatic, powerfully flavored herb, added to dishes in amounts ranging from the very heavy (several individual cloves or even an entire head of garlic, mashed or chopped coarsely) to the moderate (a tablespoon or two of diced garlic or a few shakes of garlic powder) to the very light (one or two sides of Enrico Caruso singing "Cavalleria Rusticana" played at moderate volume on a small kitchen hi-fi placed not too close to the cooking pot).
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Changes were last made on 11-20-2001
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