The Coffee Place's Joke Stack
NEVERMORE
Once upon a midnight dreary,
fingers cramped and vision bleary,
System manuals piled high
and wasted paper on the floor,
Longing for the warmth of bedsheets,
Still I sat there, doing spreadsheets:
Having reached the bottom line,
I took a floppy from the drawer.
Typing with a steady hand,
I then invoked the SAVE command
But got instead a reprimand:
It read "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
Was this some occult illusion?
Some maniacal intrusion?
These were choices Solomon himself
had never faced before.
Carefully, I weighed my options.
These three seemed to be the top ones.
Clearly, I must now adopt one:
Choose Abort, Retry, Ignore.
With my fingers pale and trembling,
Slowly toward the keyboard bending,
Longing for a happy ending,
hoping all would be restored,
Praying for some guarantee
Finally I pressed a key --
But on the screen what did I see?
Again: "Abort, Retry, Ignore?"
I tried to catch the chips off-guard --
I pressed again, but twice as hard.
Luck was just not in the cards.
I saw what I had seen before.
Now I typed in desperation
Trying random combinations
Still there came the incantation:
Choose: Abort, Retry, Ignore.
There I sat, distraught, exhausted,
by my own machine accosted
Getting up, I turned away
and paced across the office floor.
And then I saw an awful sight:
A bold and blinding flash of light --
A lightning bolt had cut the night
and shook me to my very core.
I saw the screen collapse and die
"Oh no -- my database", I cried
I thought I heard a voice reply,
"You'll see your data Nevermore."
To this day I do not know
The place to which lost data goes
I bet it goes to Heaven
where the angels have it stored.
But as for productivity, well -
I fear that it goes straight to Hell
And that's the tale I have to tell
Your choice: Abort, Retry, Ignore.
y, Ignore.
* QMPro 1.53 * Help stamp out, abolish and eliminate redundancy!!
This page is maintained by: mark@thecoffeeplace.com
Changes were last made on 11-20-2001
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