The Coffee Place's Joke Stack
New Programs for your PC
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New software for your PC!
PC-TOILET v1.0
This new product for IBM and compatible computers replaces
those silly trashcans. Yes, instead of dumping your old
files into a trashcan, you can flush them down the toilet!
Comes with PCTOILETPAPER to clean up those messy files that
are hard to flush.
PC-PAINTER v1.0
Not a graphics drawing program, PCPAINTER will actually
paint your house for you! No more having to lose valuable
computer time because your wife wants to repaint the
kitchen! Once installed onto a 1 gig drive, PCPAINTER will
be capable of painting your house in a VGA 256-color
palette.
PC-PEPSI v1.0
Instead of buying a can of Pepsi and risking infectious
diseases through the needles randomly inserted in cans, you
can use PCPEPSI to simulate the look, taste, and smell of
real Pepsi! It bubbles, it fizzes, it's better than the real
thing because you can't catch any diseases from it! Just be
careful not to spill it on your keyboard!
PC-NICOTINE v1.0
Why spend thousands of dollars a year on cigarettes when
PC-NICOTINE will provide all the carcinogens you need for the
low, low price of $39.95??? (SmellBlaster (tm) card required)
PC-SYSOP v1.0
The ultimate program for BBS Sysops! Why waste time replying
to messages that say "Yuor bord sukz and I nede more filz
rite now or I'l hak you, sukker!" when PC-SYSOP can send 50
million volts of electricity through the modem and straight
up their patooties? Avoid aggravation with PC-SYSOP!
PC-RUDEMAIL v1.0
Why be insulted via echomail by rude people that are
thousands of miles away when PC-RUDEMAIL will provide the
same features without a time lag? No more waiting 3-4 days
to have someone in Australia tell you that you're an idiot -
your computer can cut out the middleman and tell you that
you're an idiot right away!
PC-GHOST v1.0
Have you ever wondered if your computer was haunted? Now it
can be, with PC-GHOST! Guaranteed to send at least one angry
spirit screaming after your hardware. Takes the guesswork
out of figuring out what those strange sounds mean that
drive a:\ is making... they're the hollerings of the undead!
PC-TABLOID v1.0
Why wait for next week's issue of the Weekly World News when
PC-TABLOID can give you the headlines in advance? Elvis Is
Secretly Engaged To The Face On Mars! Elvis Is Hillary's
Secret Lover! Plus Lots More! PC-TABLOID is guaranteed to
check its facts just as closely as the Weekly World News.
PC-LAMER v1.0
Don't be insulted by elite warez d00dz - let PC-LAMER do it
for you! Every time you boot your system, it will remind you
that you're a pathetic lamer and will make rude sounds using
your LamerBlaster (tm) card to ensure you don't ignore it.
PC-PIR8 v1.0
Don't let the elite warez d00dz be one up on you - let
PC-PIR8 translate all your echomail messages! If you write
"Where can I get an illegal copy of Wordperfect 6.0,"
PC-PIR8 will translate it to "Hey man, eye nede a cracked
copy of WP6 for my warez colection." Spelling options
include Bad, Very Bad, and Moronic.
This page is maintained by: mark@thecoffeeplace.com
Changes were last made on 11-20-2001
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